What is anxiety? Anxiety is a general term for several disorders that cause nervousness, fear, apprehension, and worrying. I have suffered from anxiety for a good few years. 

Anxiety is no fun for anyone. Most people don’t actually understand what it’s like or what you have to go through unless you’ve suffered it yourself. Anxiety attacks come without warning and sometimes without a reason. So through my eyes, this is what I experience. most of the time I’m constantly worrying about things, everything would be fine but in my mind would tell its self to worry about stupid little things. I think with all the stuff I went through with my mam this made it a lot worse, if you haven’t read my other post my mam suffers from bipolar and having to deal with her just brought me down so much. And because I don’t talk about things I just bottled everything up. I remember my aunty saying to me go talk to someone because in years to come this will affect you. I just ignored what she said, it wasn’t till I went back to college where I noticed how bad it got. 

Nearly every night I would lay wide awake thinking I couldn’t breathe and my heart was racing 90. And even at that I just ignored it, and because I wasn’t sleeping at night this would my make my anxiety a lot worse, during the day I couldn’t function with trying to concentrate in college. Every day I would pretend that everything was grand but it wasn’t, it was getting a lot worse.  I used to be anxious about everything, especially meeting new people. This is my biggest fear. I just overthink things so meeting new people I just couldn’t deal with, I used to hate knowing that I was going somewhere where there be so many new people who I don’t know. It takes me so long to get comfortable around people I don’t know. So my first impression to people is that I’m so shy and don’t say a word, but I don’t choose to be like that, it annoys me so much that can’t talk straight away my mind just takes over and makes me overthink everything, even now I’m still like that. I just can’t deal with new people my nerves just get the best of me.

Anxiety does take over my life sometimes especially for college some days I’d rather just stay at home than go to college I feel like being at home I’m in my comfort zone where nothing bad will happen.  Last year I went to doctor about my anxiety and was prescribed tablets. I hate that I have to take tablets but they give me control over my anxiety. I do still have bad days but they don’t last as long as they did before. I still don’t talk about things but I feel doing this blog will give me a great relief from everything. If any of you are like me please talk to someone about how your feeling there is no point feeling so alone when you don’t need to. xx

below is a video which i thought explains so well what it is like to have anxiety

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